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16 questions you're too embarrassed to ask about giving birth
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There are a lot of weird things about labor that can be awkward to ask about. We've got 16 answers here, so you can avoid asking those uncomfortable questions. - photo by Melinda Fox
There's a lot of weird goings on before, during, and after labor, and you probably have a lot of questions about what is actually happening to your body. But asking these things can be awkward.

Here are 16 questions you may want to know but are uncomfortable asking. Here are their answers:

Why is mucus coming out?

The mucus you're excreting is called the mucus plug. It clogs your cervix to prevent your water from coming out. You can lose your mucus plug hours or even days before you give birth, so the mucus may be leaking for some time.

Did my water break, or did I just wet my pants?

Unlike the movies where a woman's water breaks with a splat on the floor, water breaking is more like a slow trickle. If your water breaks, it will leak amniotic fluid. Amniotic fluid is usually colorless but it can have a slightly yellow tint, flecks of blood, or flecks of white mucus.

What if I have to go to the bathroom when I'm in labor?

You go on the delivery table. But don't be embarrassed. It's actually very common because the muscles you use in a bowel movement are the same muscles you use to push your baby. But this means the doctors and nurses have certainly seen it before. They will do their best to keep you clean and comfortable.

Why are my teeth chattering?

It's common to get chills, shivers, or for your teeth to chatter during labor. This can be a reaction to anesthesia, stress, or an endorphin release.

Will my vagina return to normal?

Your vagina expanded a lot to birth your baby, so you may wonder if it will return to a normal size. Although, it may take a while, you should be back to normal in a few months.

Should I be bleeding this much after giving birth?

Your body needs to continue to expel the material it used to care for your baby. Removing it all from your body can take several weeks. Because of this, you will need to wear large maxi pads (tampons may not fit and can increase your risk of infection). It's also common for hospitals to give you mesh underpants to wear.

Is it okay if my bleeding changes colors?

It's absolutely normal for your discharge to change from red to brown to yellow. This means that your body is healing properly.

Am I too small to nurse?

The size of your breasts doesnt have anything to do with milk production. Small breasts still have milk ducts, just less fatty tissue.

Is it okay if nursing is hard for me?

It might feel embarrassing to admit you're having challenges or feel pain while nursing because it's "supposed to be natural." But the naturalness of breastfeeding is more like walking than breathing; you need to learn how to do it and challenges are common. Feel free to ask a lactation specialist for help.

Why do I feel like Im having contractions when Im nursing?

Because you are. Nursing triggers a hormone called oxytocin. These contractions will help your uterus shrink back to its original size.

Why do I keep wetting my pants?

You may find that the slightest movement causes you to wet your pants a bit. This is normal and is called "urinary incontinence." After childbirth, your muscles may be weakened, lessening your ability to control your bladder. As you heal, this issue should go away. However, if it doesn't by the time you have your postnatal check, you should tell your doctor about it.

Why does going to the bathroom hurt?

After giving birth, a bowel movement will probably be painful. As a result of birthing a child, you may have anal fissures and irritated veins, commonly called hemorrhoids, which can cause both bleeding and painful bowel movements.

Is it okay to have sex?

Up until you have birth, it's absolutely safe to have sex as long as the woman can tolerate it. However, she should wait at least 6 weeks or until the birth discharge stops to have sex after giving birth.

Can I get pregnant directly after giving birth?

Yes. It's a myth that you can't get pregnant when breastfeeding. You can get pregnant just days after giving birth. If you don't want to get pregnant, you must use a contraceptive.
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How to avoid 'sharenting' and other paparazzi parenting habits
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A recent study revealed parents often spend up to two hours staging a single photo of his or her child to post online. - photo by Amy Iverson
Before having kids, some people just dont appreciate their friends baby posts. But after having a child of their own, three fourths of new parents jump right on the parental social media bandwagon. If you have become a member of this group, there are some rules to follow for posting responsibly.

Much of a parents worry is how to teach their children to use social media responsibly. We talk with our kids about privacy, oversharing, and setting restrictions on their devices to keep them safe. But parents themselves need to look in the digital mirror once in a while. Before having children, it doesnt take as much effort to think about what to post online. Its up to us to decide what we share about our own lives. But once you become a parent, there are many questions to think about regarding what is appropriate to post about your kids on social media.

In a recent survey, kids clothing subscription company Mac and Mia surveyed 2000 new parents to find out how they are documenting their kids lives on social media, and what concerns they may have.

First of all, people without children seem to feel a bit differently about the onslaught of baby pictures online than those who are parents. 18 percent of people say before they had kids, they were annoyed by their friends baby posts. But after having children of their own, 73 percent admit they post progress pictures of their little ones every single month.

Not only are new parents letting the world know each time their baby is a month older, but they are posting about their kids every few days or so. Men and women report they post 6-7 times per month about their baby.

And while 70 percent of new parents say the benefit of using social media is how easy it is to help family and friends feel involved, there are some downsides. Here are a few tips to avoid the pitfall of becoming paparazzi parents.

Dont miss the moment

In the Mac and Mia survey, some parents admitted to spending up to two hours to get the perfect shot of their baby. That seems a little extreme. New and old parents alike should be careful about spending so much time taking pictures and videos that they dont enjoy the moment. Years ago, I decided to never live an experience through my phone. A study by Linda Henkel, a psychology professor at Fairfield University in Connecticut, found that when people took pictures of objects in an art museum, they didnt remember the objects as well as if they simply observed them.

This photo-taking impairment effect can happen to parents as well. If we are so consumed by getting the perfect photo, we can miss out on the moment all together, and our memory of it will suffer.

Dont forget about privacy

60 percent of couples say they have discussed rules and boundaries for posting their babys photos, according to the Mac and Mia survey. Even so, men are 34 percent more likely to publish baby posts on public accounts. If parents are concerned about their childrens privacy, keeping photos off of public accounts is a given.

In the Washington Post, Stacey Steinberg, a legal skills professor at the University of Florida, and Bahareh Keith, a Portland pediatrician, wrote that sharing too much information about kids online puts them at risk. They write that all that sharenting can make it easier for data thieves to target out kids for identity theft. Check that your privacy settings are where they should be and never share identifying information like full names and birth dates.

Dont be paparazzi parents

36 percent of parents say they take issue when their childs photo is posted online by someone else. Responsible social media users will always ask permission before posting a photo of another child. But parents should also think about whether their own children will take issue with their own posted photos a few years down the road.

When parents are constantly snapping pictures and throwing them on social media, it can be easy to forget to pause and make sure the post is appropriate. I always use the billboard example with my kids. I ask them to picture whatever they are posting going up on a billboard in our neighborhood. If they are okay with that, then their post is probably fine. Parents should ask themselves this same question when posting about their children. But they should also ask themselves if their child would be OK with this post on a billboard in 15 years. If it would cause embarrassment or humiliation, it might be best to keep it private.

Once children reach an appropriate age, parents should include them in the process of deciding what pictures are OK to post. Researchers at the University of Michigan surveyed 10- to 17-year-olds and found children believe their parents should ask permission more than parents think they should. The kids in the survey said sharing happy family moments, or accomplishments in sports, school and hobbies is fine. But when the post is negative (like when a child is disciplined) or embarrassing (think naked baby pictures or messy hair), kids say to keep it off social media.
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