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10 things moms do that are super annoying
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If you are a mom, or are planning on becoming one, be wary of these 10 super annoying things all moms do. - photo by Georgia Lee

Becoming a mom is a momentous occasion. But let's face it, being a mom has some "side effects" we all notice. If you are a mom, or are planning on becoming one, be weary of these 10 super-annoying things moms do:

1. Moms judge women who don’t have kids.

Maybe not outright, maybe not very obviously, but there seems to be some secret judging in the minds of many moms when it comes to their childless friends. It could be jealousy or even a little pride, but a mother has a different relationship with her childless friends when her own baby is born. A level of understanding and empathy is altered when you make the leap into motherhood.

2. Moms insist others have children, too.

Moms – especially new moms and empty-nesters – have a tendency to not so subtly suggest you have children, too. Presumably so you can share her joys ... and some sleepless nights. It's natural to want to share what you have, but this particular question can be intrusive. Childbirth and parenting are huge undertaking, and not be entered into lightly; or unduly influenced.

3. Moms can’t focus.

Mothers of young ones are easily distracted and forgetful (but for a good reason). She’ll call you, scold her kids, hang up, and call you back, but forget what she was talking about. The only way you can keep a mom’s attention for a full conversation is to get her in person and get her alone. We understand that it's hard to focus when the three-year-old could run off with the scissors at any moment, but it's frustrating when I'm trying to talk to you.

4. Moms are always late.

Or just break plans altogether. As a mother, kids come first. Kids also take forever to get all ready to go. Even with a babysitter, things can still be cancelled. Mommy emergencies can make getting together impossible — good thing her kids are darling.

5. Moms talk to adults like children.

We understand a mom has taken on a protective and disciplinary role, but she may need to be reminded when it’s time to clock out from the job and just be a woman, a friend, or a wife.

6. Moms give unsolicited advice.

... especially about parenting. Doing something 24 hours a day, 7 days a week can convince anyone they're an expert. But unless someone comes to you in need of guidance, try to gauge whether others want to hear your pearls of wisdom. We may not need your unsolicited advice.

7. Moms may need some reminding.

A mother can easily lose her identity in motherhood and forget who she was before she was a mom. Through the sleepless nights, midnight feedings, diaper duty, and sporadic showers and meals, a mom may not remember what she liked, what she valued, or what was important or interesting to her before the bundles of joy arrived.

8. Moms lose perspective in parenting.

A mother’s world can become quite small. She may talk nonstop about every little thing her child says and does because that's her world now. Her world revolves around her child, so she assumes the rest of the world has to revolve around her and her child as well. A mother will advocate aggressively for her rights as a mother and the rights of her child without always considering the perspective of others in the situation.

9. Moms assume other people want to be around her kids.

Sometimes a mom thinks anywhere she wants to go, her children should be welcome as well. Very young and ill-behaved children do not belong in expensive and posh establishments; like fancy restaurants, galas and art museums. Nor should young children accompany parents to bars, clubs, wine tastings or pub crawls. Even without a posted sign, some things are “adult only.”

10. Moms can’t be spontaneous.

A mom has to ask permission, arrange sitting and organize several schedules before she can commit to anything. Plans need to be made weeks in advance, and can still be up in the air minutes before she’s due somewhere.

Motherhood is an arduous task and needs to be sympathized with. If you understand where a mother is coming from, these annoying habits can be taken with a grain of salt and forgiven. Just ask for the same thing in return when you do annoying things as someone without kids.

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How to avoid 'sharenting' and other paparazzi parenting habits
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A recent study revealed parents often spend up to two hours staging a single photo of his or her child to post online. - photo by Amy Iverson
Before having kids, some people just dont appreciate their friends baby posts. But after having a child of their own, three fourths of new parents jump right on the parental social media bandwagon. If you have become a member of this group, there are some rules to follow for posting responsibly.

Much of a parents worry is how to teach their children to use social media responsibly. We talk with our kids about privacy, oversharing, and setting restrictions on their devices to keep them safe. But parents themselves need to look in the digital mirror once in a while. Before having children, it doesnt take as much effort to think about what to post online. Its up to us to decide what we share about our own lives. But once you become a parent, there are many questions to think about regarding what is appropriate to post about your kids on social media.

In a recent survey, kids clothing subscription company Mac and Mia surveyed 2000 new parents to find out how they are documenting their kids lives on social media, and what concerns they may have.

First of all, people without children seem to feel a bit differently about the onslaught of baby pictures online than those who are parents. 18 percent of people say before they had kids, they were annoyed by their friends baby posts. But after having children of their own, 73 percent admit they post progress pictures of their little ones every single month.

Not only are new parents letting the world know each time their baby is a month older, but they are posting about their kids every few days or so. Men and women report they post 6-7 times per month about their baby.

And while 70 percent of new parents say the benefit of using social media is how easy it is to help family and friends feel involved, there are some downsides. Here are a few tips to avoid the pitfall of becoming paparazzi parents.

Dont miss the moment

In the Mac and Mia survey, some parents admitted to spending up to two hours to get the perfect shot of their baby. That seems a little extreme. New and old parents alike should be careful about spending so much time taking pictures and videos that they dont enjoy the moment. Years ago, I decided to never live an experience through my phone. A study by Linda Henkel, a psychology professor at Fairfield University in Connecticut, found that when people took pictures of objects in an art museum, they didnt remember the objects as well as if they simply observed them.

This photo-taking impairment effect can happen to parents as well. If we are so consumed by getting the perfect photo, we can miss out on the moment all together, and our memory of it will suffer.

Dont forget about privacy

60 percent of couples say they have discussed rules and boundaries for posting their babys photos, according to the Mac and Mia survey. Even so, men are 34 percent more likely to publish baby posts on public accounts. If parents are concerned about their childrens privacy, keeping photos off of public accounts is a given.

In the Washington Post, Stacey Steinberg, a legal skills professor at the University of Florida, and Bahareh Keith, a Portland pediatrician, wrote that sharing too much information about kids online puts them at risk. They write that all that sharenting can make it easier for data thieves to target out kids for identity theft. Check that your privacy settings are where they should be and never share identifying information like full names and birth dates.

Dont be paparazzi parents

36 percent of parents say they take issue when their childs photo is posted online by someone else. Responsible social media users will always ask permission before posting a photo of another child. But parents should also think about whether their own children will take issue with their own posted photos a few years down the road.

When parents are constantly snapping pictures and throwing them on social media, it can be easy to forget to pause and make sure the post is appropriate. I always use the billboard example with my kids. I ask them to picture whatever they are posting going up on a billboard in our neighborhood. If they are okay with that, then their post is probably fine. Parents should ask themselves this same question when posting about their children. But they should also ask themselves if their child would be OK with this post on a billboard in 15 years. If it would cause embarrassment or humiliation, it might be best to keep it private.

Once children reach an appropriate age, parents should include them in the process of deciding what pictures are OK to post. Researchers at the University of Michigan surveyed 10- to 17-year-olds and found children believe their parents should ask permission more than parents think they should. The kids in the survey said sharing happy family moments, or accomplishments in sports, school and hobbies is fine. But when the post is negative (like when a child is disciplined) or embarrassing (think naked baby pictures or messy hair), kids say to keep it off social media.
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